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Inconceivable

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  Losing Dalton has been brutal, no doubt about it. I didn’t get a choice. But if I had, I would’ve never willingly sacrificed him for the needs of others. In fact, I’ve spent much of the last (almost) 4 years kicking, screaming, and pounding my fists on the ground in protest of my unimaginable loss.  And that’s what makes this next statement so inconceivable. God did exactly this. He willingly sacrificed His One and Only Son for the needs of every human. But He wasn’t just willing. He even went so far as to devise the plan.  A plan that would require His Son to innocently hang and painfully die on a cross. For me.  For you.  For all humanity. I would NEVER, not even for a millisecond, consider such an act. God knew what Jesus had to endure.  He witnessed every last injustice committed against His Son. Jesus was: Falsely accused. Spit upon. Brutally beaten. Rejected. Humiliated. Mocked. Betrayed. Devalued. Pierced. Murdered. And because this mission was completed, Christ rescued us by
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Lessons On Prayer: Talking to God When Your Heart Is Broken

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  Prayer in the midst of deep loss and suffering can feel challenging, confusing, and even impossible in some cases.   Recently, a deacon at my church shared his testimony about the faithfulness of God in answering his bold, intentional prayers related to the health of a loved one.  There is no doubt that God hears every prayer we offer. Tension arises, however, when circumstances occur in life that don’t line up with what we expect from the God we always touted as good, faithful, and loving.   Throughout that service, God was nudging me to share my testimony as a follow-up to the truths expressed by this fellow believer. Our experiences are far from contradictory. In fact, they complement each other by validating how God reveals Himself and His character through our prayers in every circumstance of life, including those of joy and yes, even sorrow.   God has three types of responses to our requests.  Sometimes His reply is yes, which feels really uplifting to our human hearts.  A res
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"You Don't Know What You Have Until It's Gone" Doesn't Have To Be True

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  “ You don’t know what you have until it’s gone ” doesn’t have to be true. Does it seem odd to anyone else that we wait until a person dies to notice what made them loved and appreciated? The phrase “ better late than never ” certainly doesn’t apply in this situation. When it’s impossible to maintain a physical, reciprocal relationship with an individual, our hearts naturally zoom in on everything we loved about them but will never get to experience with them again. The rest doesn’t seem to matter anymore. It can even appear as though the person who died lived a “saintly life.”  As Dalton’s family, we’re guilty of this ourselves.  And anyone who knew Dalton knows he was far from a saint (but neither are we).  But without him here, there is zero purpose in focusing on the parts of him that sometimes drove us crazy. The reality is, we would give anything to have ALL of Dalton back, the lovely and the not-so-lovely. His not-so-lovely doesn’t look not-so-lovely anymore. The love for him
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My Comfort Is Dependent On My Cooperation

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  When my kids were little, part of my job as their mom was to comfort them when they were hurting.  Sometimes this was after a physical injury such as a bike accident or a sports injury on the basketball court or football field.  Other times, one of them needed emotional support resulting from a disagreement with a friend or some other disappointing loss.  Because they were two unique human beings with distinct personalities , the approach I took to ease their pain was also poles apart.   I’m reluctant to admit that I’ve found myself resistant to some of the words I‘ve read or heard from other well-meaning people also walking through grief as I search for comfort.  What was helpful for them often leaves me empty,  yet full of guilt.  Why do I push away their thoughts?  They’re just trying to help me. Am I self-selecting only what I want to believe?  Is my faith weak, leaving me in doubt of God’s promises? Am I just a difficult, bitter person who is always on the defense now that I’ve
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